The journey continues

11/20 - BFP! So excited, hubby and I just got married in October, went off the pill in Sept and got pregnant our first month trying.

11/23 - HCG levels 32

11/29 - started bleeding bright red and cramping. Went to the ER, thought for sure I was misscarying (5 weeks)
They did a pelvic and said my cervix was closed. No baby or sac seen on internal u/s. HCG 327. Ordered to see my OBGYN 12/1 and do HCG then.

12/1 - u/s no baby or sac again. HCG 380. still bleeding lightly. Told I was miscarrying. Appt to come back on 12/5.

12/2 - Terrible left side cramping and low back cramping. Heating pad and hot baths did nothing. Tylenol did not even touch the pain.

12/5. u/s shows 2.2cm ectopic in my left tube. HCG 360. Given choice of methotrexate or surgery. Opted for shot. Went for kidney and liver panels. All were good.

12/6 - Methotrexate 90mg, one shot in each butt cheek. Cramping and more bleeding.

12/7 - More cramping, heavier bleeding. Passed tissue that is reddish pinkish and has some grey in it. Is this the sac already? Doctor told me my body would absorb it. Saved tissue to take to next appt.

Scheduled for another HCG on 12/10 and 12/13.

12/10 - HCG 260

12/11 - Stabbing Pains, Nausea - Went to ER - they gave me dilaudid and did another u/s. Said to followup with OBGYN. Still bleeding.

12/12 - Followed up, internal bleeding shown on u/s, mass got bigger (3.2cm) -- Scheduled for surgery at 6pm. Laparoscopy. Mass Removed from Left tube and tube saved. Not sewn, will heal on its own. Stayed overnight in the hospital on 3 East. Got no sleep.

12/13 - Sore. Exhausted. Taking percocets and only sleeping 20 min at a time. d/c from hospital at 4pm. HCG 200

12/16 - Looks like a pos. OPK. not sure.
HCG internet cheapie faint faint line

12/17 - BLEEDING STOPPED after 18 days. Just slight spotting - ends by the end of the day. HCG internet cheapie faint faint line

12/19 - HCG 6.8!!! ~ No line on the HCG internet cheapie

Go for ONE more HCG draw next week, they want me down to 2.

SO glad this is almost over.

Bittersweet. Crying everyday. Seeing babies when we go out is torture. I am always going to wonder what would have been... who would he or she be? What would they look like? I will never know. For now, I cry to my husband nightly. I hope that in time, this pain will ease up.

*Update*

12/29 - HCG less than 2. No more blood draws.